On the Road: Retrospective

I've been traveling quite a bit lately, which I guess is also a partial explanation for the obscene amounts of money I've been spending. But alas, alack, life has caught up with me. With the holidays behind us, and with no further adventures on the horizon (save a trial in late March, which should be pretty fun), time has come to pause and look back, and jot some notes down here about places I've been, before such details are lots.

Spent quite a lot of time in New England lately, and I have to say that, but for the winter thing, I like it. Winter is probably a deal breaker against me ever living there, but weather didn't impinge much on me seeing New England as a tourist. Winter might even added to the experience, since it's been I while since I've been in the snow. In any rate, my defining memory of the cold weather there is not focused on shivering my ass off (through the warmest coat I own) while stomping through a snowy movie-theater parking lot (AVATAR is spectacular in 3D IMAX, by the way; spend the extra money). Rather, when I think of New England winter, I tend to recall watching the wind blowing snowdrifts down from the branches of the pine trees outside the windows, as I sat in the hot-tub at the Foxwoods resort spa, between steam baths.

Yeah, that was a rough day. Let the record reflect: anyone using the term "dream home" better be imagining something with a steam bath and a whirlpool. Short of that standard, houses can be way up there, even running past "very nice," and into "spectacular." But if you use the term "dream house," there better be acceptable spa facilities.

Winter aside, New England summers are pleasantly cool and green, and the fall really does bring all those colors out on the trees. For west-coasters: you know how people from the east never seem to believe that the paintings and photos of desert sunsets really do reflect the range of colors in the reality? Same way: the trees and plants in New England really do show all those colors you see in pics and paintings.

As for specific locales, I've decided that I love Boston, and have even considered LLM programs there. The winter thing is potentially problematic, but I think spending winters in city-life is easier than any suburb-based existence. Moreso in Boston, since if I lived there, I probably wouldn't have a car.

Great town, with character all it's own, and character based not just on the truly astounding numbers of both churches and dive bars. San Francisco has vibe that you can't explain, but that everyone feels. New York is the same, but instead of a vibe, has almost electric energy. Boston has HISTORY you can feel. Between the architecture, the cemetaries, and the living tradition, Boston's accumulated centuries are tangible as you walk from the Common to Faneuil Hall, and it's not a looming uncomfortable feeling. The substantial completion of the Big Dig means there's no longer a freeway running along the waterfront, but instead a series of parks, so Boston is a GREAT town for a walking tour, and the smells of the place are spectacular. Wet stone. Unhealthy cooking. Overtones of pipe tobacco. Add in the fact that you literally cannot walk a block without passing a Dunkin Donuts or a Bank of America, and I can see that it's an easy city to live in, so long as you didn't have to drive, since that city was CLEARLY never intended to deal with vehicular traffic.

I would honestly consider living in Boston, if it could bring itself to raze the City Hall and government center, which is by far the UGLIEST expanse of architecture I have ever seen. Old City Hall, a few blocks away - which is now a Ruth's Chris steakhouse - is gorgeous. Likewise the State House (the golden dome on the hill at the corner of the Common). South Station. Feneuil Hall. Anything along Newbury Street. SO much beauty in that city. So it's amazing that the City managed to saddle itself with perhaps the ugliest municipal center known to man. I understand that this is something that Bostonians are generally embarassed about. Honestly speaking, they should be, especially if they lived there in the late 60's, and might have done something about it.

But all in all, I like Boston, and will go there again. I have no doubt that Boston will continue to be a healthy bustling city into perpetuity.

Hartford, on the other hand, is pretty clearly a city that's dying. With the insurance industry scattering its workforce out to whatever cheap office space can be found fronting on the information superhighway, the city that was the industry's physical epicenter seems to have a lot of empty buildings and broken windows. Despite being almost 400 years old, Hartford put all its eggs in one basket, and most of those eggs have been lost or gone rotten. All in all, Hartford seems to be deluding itself about how things are going to go from here, since the city focus is on more housing, instead of on more middle-class jobs.

With the top of the economic food chain drying up, there's not a whole lot of trickle down, which seems to be causing some pretty impressive gentrification. The Old Money still distinctly has their enclaves (NOBODY carries their nose higher in the air than a CT Blueblood), but there is not much in the way of a middle class. Even the insurance carriers and businesses that still maintain offices in the city have realized that it's cheaper to use generic commercial space in the suburbs and do business electronically, and I gotta believe that the number of empty offices in the downtown buildings is growing steadily. With the middle-class workforce (and related businesses and industries) fleeing for greener pastures, the city as a whole is in danger of turning into Detroit and forming burbclaves: small armed camps of the wealthy "elite," separated only by a fence from miles and miles of housing projects and neighborhoods where you can't walk the streets at night. Barring some major renaissance, I think the only real hope for Hartford is New York growing big enough and close enough to shine some light on it.

Which is a shame, since as an old city, Hartford is beautiful. I couldn't help but look at some of the (empty, falling down) red brick buildings and think that if that building was ANYWHERE in, e.g., San Diego, the building itself would be reason enough for an artists' community and a farmers market to spring up around it. What is a broken-down wreck in a Hartford suburb would be a landmark in any San Diego suburb. But San Diego is healthy and diversified, with 3 major universities, a dozen major industries, and only a minimum of cultural pretense or snobbery to weigh it down. At this point Hartford has healthy and diversified pretension and snobbery, but only a minimum of institutions and industries. I hope I'm wrong about this, but I don't think I am, and wonder what's going to happen to the city should Pratt have any sort of necking-down.

In terms of other Connecticut locations, Foxwoods is nice, especially in winter. But it's got nothing on Vegas, which is also a hell of a lot easier to get into and out of. Seriously; even if you're coming from New York, it's not all that much extra travel effort to get to Vegas.

All in all, I've decided that I really like New England as a tourist, regardless of the season. But barring a few years study at some Boston university, I will almost certainly never live there.

Turning to other locales, my other notable trip in recent months was to Nassau. Specifically, to Paradise Island. Which these days is just another way of saying "The Atlantis Resort and Casino," which takes up about 90% of the island, with notable exceptions being Nicholas Cage's house, a yoga retreat, and the hole-in-the-wall hotel I stayed at. (Club Land'Or. Was funny: for a lost kingdom, Atlantis was pretty distinct, but everybody - especially at Atlantis - seemed to be telling themselves that Club Land'Or didn't really exist at all.) You can count on your fingers the number of properties on Paradise Island that are NOT part of Atlantis.

This is neither a good thing nor a bad thing, although I gotta believe that on the whole, Atlantis has done vast damage to the economy of Nassau. Aside from Paradise/Atlantis and a surprisingly small downtown area catering to the cruise-ship port, Nassau is pretty clearly a third-world country. Most of the small shops, bars, and so forth outside those areas have closed, which is a bad sign for an island nation who's primary industry is tourism. The fact is that Atlantis has pushed out everything else. This is a problem since Atlantis is really not an every-mans' travel destination. Too expensive. Rooms are hundreds of dollars a night. A cocktail costs $12. Don't ask about food prices. Nearly the entire tourism market is under Atlantis' thumb, and they've set prices high.

Which is not such a good thing in these economic times. The marina is packed with million-dollar mega-yachts, and the Elton John and Michael Jackson suites (each $25,000 a night) are booked for the next five years. But there are lots of empty rooms in the hotel towers, and not a lot of people wandering the shops and restaurants. With Atlantis clearly catering to people with fuck-you money, and with Atlantis pushing out everything that's NOT Atlantis, I expect more and more middle-money people who might be going to Nassau will be headed instead to Freeport, Kingston, or the BVIs. This will not be a good thing for the Bahamas as a whole. If nothing else there's not a whole lot of local color left to enjoy; it's been commercialized and centralized, at Atlantis. Most or all of Nassau's restaurants, clubs, bars, taco stands, or what have you are closed down, boarded up, and places you'd worry about walking through the neighborhood after dark. We didn't make it to Cable Beach, so there might be signs of life there, but otherwise, luxury facilities at luxury prices was pretty much the name of the game.

All that having been said, Paradise Island was a GREAT place to spend a week hanging around and celebrating birthdays with friends. Beach weather was acceptable-to-good in the middle of January. Food was expensive, but had large portions. Drinks were expensive, but high in alcohol content. If what you're looking for is casual, low-speed relaxation, and can bring yourself to not fret about costs, Atlantis and its environs are the place to be.

And if you feel the need for an adventure, you can find that in Nassau as well: just take a ride with Bahama John (Cell: 242-477-2716) (Yes, I got his card; only one I kept from the trip). He was our cab driver from the hotel back to the airport, which means he essentially drove us the length of the island. HO-LEE SHIT what a ride. First of all, the Bahamas is one of those places where "lane lines" are really just "guidelines." Since it's a two-lane road for most of the way from Paradise to the airport, and since it's fairly common to get stuck behind, e.g., a backhoe or other piece of heavy machinery, it's completely routine for cabdrivers to swerve suddenly in front of other drivers, pass on the wrong side, pass on the right side in the face of oncoming traffic, and so forth.

Now. Imagine if Mad Max had a psychotic, rum-soaked, Caribbean cab-driver uncle. That's Bahamma John. To his credit, we made if from Land'Or Resort to the International Terminal in absolutely astounding time, notwithstanding fairly heavy traffic, and without a single instance of physical contact with another vehicle or stationary object. You could at least slide a piece of paper between John's minivan and our closest passage to whatever the other object might be. There were a few times where there might not have been enough room for TWO sheets of paper, but we did emerge from the ride unscathed, as our driver's skill somehow balanced out his driving style, at least for the limited duration of that trip. Severe damage to parts of the vehicle suggested that this was not always the case, but while he was under our employ, the guy was a true road warrior. And I say that even though my usual mind-set is that cab-drivers are nominally tied with mimes and performance artists for the title of "lowest form of life on earth."

Still. Imagine being confronted with the World's Greatest Taxidermist. You find him a bit odd, or even disturbing personally. His profession seems unquestionably distasteful. But you can't help but appreciate his ability as a master within his field. Notwithstanding any terror inspired by the ride, and notwithstanding cold sweats at even the idea of sharing the road with the bastard, I have total respect for Bahama John as a cab driver, and he definitely provided a lively ride, well worth the ticket price.

Highlights of our trip included at at least 17 major cuttings-off of other drivers (memorably including swerving from a turn-lane into the #1 position at a stop-light, pulling ahead of and bypassing seven cars already waiting in the que at that light), nearly getting run off the road by a semi-truck while passing on the wrong side, John pointing out where his brother had been killed in (surprise!) a car accident, several instances of passing by "making space" in the middle of a two-lane road, with traffic coming at 55 mph in the other direction, and any number of slamming on the brakes to avoid any number of eminent collisions with other vehicles. And never once did any of this interrupt his ongoing narration of notable points of Nassau's history and geography, save only for sparking supplemental commentary about how other people on the roads were all assholes and shitty drivers.

It was AWESOME, in a choose-now-whether-to-laugh-or-cry, fingernails-dug-into-the-dashboard kind of way, where terror somehow turns into hilarity, based on nothing more than the driver's "business as usual" demeanor.

So all in all, it's been an interesting few months, and I'm looking forward to where the next few months might take me. Might even find a little more time to write between now and then. Which is always helped by people prodding and poking me to get off my ass and produce something, by the way. Hint hint.