Vacation Ideas

Well. Some things have changed.

In fact, they've changed so much that I don't have time to really do justice to everything that's happened in the last year or so. So I'm kinda gonna have to just gloss over the things that've happened. If I don't gloss it over, if I postpone writing anything until addressing the details, I probably wouldn't post anything here for a long, long time. I don't yet have the words.

So I'm going to try to jump back into writing by relating an example of how my perspective has changed recently. The Las Vegas Outdoor Sports Expo is in town this weekend. And I'm considering gathering up Jen and our parents and going with Tommy. I'm genuinely curious what sort of adventure and vacation packages are available for my current demographic, and I'm sure there are some serious options, since I'm sure there are a lot of people like me who have disposable income. Lets dispense with the bullshit, go to the expo, and see the best they've got.

While it's not necessarily an adventure getaway, I'm curious as to whether there's somewhere in the world that can offer me a week in a bungalow on a tropical beach. Think Thomas Crown's little shack on Bermuda. A place like that. Ten minutes from town; close enough for take out or delivery, or for the book store. Full kitchen. Well stocked fridge and pantry. Wine cellar. King size four poster in a room made mostly of screens, shutters, and light tropical breaze.

And then add in all the things that would really matter. Nursery for boy, with excellent electronic monitors, and with every conceivable light and sound option. In town (10 minutes by jeep down a well-lit paved road) there's full medical services, and a little cabin your parents can rent. (The cabin has a full nursery.) Dog friendly. And they can roam freely, since you've got the beach to yourself. (No, don't worry about where they crap. We got it.) 

And the kicker. The whole bungalow is wired to resonate with binaural delta tones. Those deep vibrations, down below one hertz, that you feel in your bones when you're falling asleep in an underway cruise ship. The best part of relaxing on a plane or a train. In this place on the beach, there's a button on the wall that you push, and the whole place goes into 'car ride' mode.

Find me a set of young parents anywhere who wouldn't pay a shit-ton for a weekend at a beach cabana where there's a 'car ride' button. A fucking button you can push to get your baby to quickly and naturally chill out, calm down, and Go The Fuck To Sleep.™

Wow.

I'm getting a little choked up just fantasizing that such a thing might exist. I love being a dad, and I've got the best, most type-B baby anyone has ever seen. But I'd still pay the asking price for vacation with my wife  where there's a button that more or less guarantees us a 20 minute or longer nap on demand.

So in the absence of anything else to do, we might go take a look at the expo this weekend. I want to look around to see what sort of options are available along these lines. And I'm going to be hugely disappointed if nobody has a 'car ride button' option on a nursery-equipped tropical bungalow, because that shit would be pure fucking gold.